Consumerist posted a list of the worst ads in 2011, according to their readers.
I don’t agree with all the rankings, of course. I mean, the AT&T ad is definitely worse than the Luvs ad.
But, on creepiest ad of the year – yeah. I haven’t even SEEN it, but just the fact that there IS a Pos-T-Vac penis vaccuum? And they made a commercial for it?
Check out the list here: http://consumerist.com/2011/10/announcing-the-2011-worst-ad-in-america-nominees.html
Worth the read.
Okay, I understand that in the world of gasoline sales, that there really aren’t a lot of points of differentiation. Location. Cost. For those who pay attention to that type of thing, how eco-conscious your parent company is. Other than that, it’s gas – it’s not like there’s a lot of variation.
Which is why Citgo’s latest marketing makes me wonder WTFWTT?
If you have to tell me your gas is good, I'm probably going to think you're full of it.
Citgo has always been known for usually being a few cents less than what I guess you’d call the larger brands, like Mobil, BP, Shell.
And back in the early 90s, I remember people suggesting their gas had additives that caused problems for vehicles. But that was 20 years ago, was refuted 20 years ago, has not been really talked about for 20 years.
Which makes their current campaign so counterproductive.
Their copy might as well have been, “Remember how people made fun of us before? Oh, you don’t? Well, okay… well, there were problems back then, issues with the quality of our product. But, but, but we’ve fixed EVERYTHING. No really! Our gas is good. We promise, cross our hearts and hope to die.”
Seriously. WTFWYT?!
Here is an ad that is making me really wonder WTF.
Not because of the ad’s creative, or the content, but because apparently, it’s too controversial – too provocative – to be shown on cable networks that target women.
Today. In 2011.
Take a look.
Now, this ad is not running yet. So how do I know the story? A friend of mine that I’ve done social media work with before is currently working with the company that produced the TV ad above and contacted me because she was frustrated and fully in a WTF frame of mind.
She was pissed because it really is designed to HELP women. The ad directs you to their site, which is here, so you can learn more: http://www.intensitynow.com.
So, WTF? Apparently cable networks that are trying to reach the female audience are stuck back in the 1950s.
Back in the days, of I Love Lucy they had to show twin beds for married couples because it would be SCANDAL if they actually shared a bed. But didn’t Madonna and the DiVinyls actually start opening up acceptance of the idea that women can enjoy physical pleasure?
Apparently not on women’s cable networks. Like Style, Oprah Winfrey Network, and Women’s Entertainment. Because they think this ad is too risqué for air except during the after 1am slot.
Hmmm. No one had a problem with Enzyte commercials being run during primetime. And with that shit-eating grin on the guy’s face, and the wife just shrugging, it’s pretty clear to me that the product wasn’t targeting a woman’s pleasure. No. It was geared to please men.
Yet a product for women? OH DEAR GOD NO!!!! We can’t POSSIBLY run that.
We can run KY His and Hers commercials – because those show a man and a woman together. But a woman entire of herself and capable of enjoying herself without a man in her life. HEAVEN FORFEND! We can’t POSSIBLY have THAT!
So, to spite those networks (and out of my near-insatiable curiosity), I went out and got myself one.
Here. Let me tell you about it.
First off, let’s talk about the vibrator portion of the thing. See that little tri-pod-y thing sticking out? That’s for clitoral stimulation.
The bump below it on the shaft stimulates your G-spot.
Both those sections vibrate. There are 5 levels of vibration intensity. Honestly, I only took it up to 2, and it was Puh-lenty.
Now, in the next picture, you see the shaft? It expands. The technical term is “inflates,” since you use air to make it expand, but I don’t want you to think balloon. This thing is TOUGH.
Before I began using it, I pumped it up to a diameter that was… well, I can’t decide if it was comical or obscene. Let’s just say, there are no size limitations with this thing. It’s easy to get to just the right size. And you can tell what size you need it at when you’re using it, so no fears of overinflating. If you pump it too much, you simply press the button on the bottom and it quickly deflates for you.
Looking again at the second picture, you’ll see little metal sections on the top and bottom. Turns out these are electrodes. Yes, electrodes. No. There’s no need to be scared. It doesn’t work like you’re thinking. This isn’t the feeling you get when you touch your tongue to a 9-volt. It feels completely… well, natural. You know how the light touch of fingertips across your back tingles and feels amazing? Like that, only not across your back. And you can change how strongly you feel it.
Once you’ve pumped it to fit, you turn on the electrodes – the instructions warn not to have that turned on until you have it inside you, and I wasn’t going to test out what happened if you didn’t follow the instructions. Sorry. You’ll have to test that yourself if you’re that curious. I’m not going there.
Once the electrodes are on, you get this tingly pulsing feeling. There isn’t any feeling of shock – you just feel your muscles working. They way they would if you were having an orgasm. Which, based on my experience, makes your brain feel the orgasm just the same.
At level 1, you probably won’t even feel it. It goes up to level 10.
4 was the best setting for me. I tried 5, but that was a little more power than I needed. But I haven’t had kids. 4 pretty much rocked my house.
Another cool thing is that the vibrator and muscle-workout parts have separate controls. You can use one, the other, or both. So, if you’re the type of woman (like my best friend) that literally doesn’t get off on vibrators, this thing provides options. I liked having it all on, but I might experiment, too. Probably will. Okay, definitely will.
And apparently on top of all this, this thing can help with improved sexual health. Because a link my friend forwarded to me when she was bitching about the damned networks shows that working out your inner muscles like this thing does makes you have better orgasms. And it makes you more easily aroused.
Not that I really needed THAT. But I do know a lot of women out there who I think would be a lot more pleasant if they worked out more – if you know what I mean. Anyway, you can read the study yourself it you want. It’s at http://www.springerlink.com/content/541173h6r1655858/.
Now for all you men who are scared that your woman will decide she doesn’t need your sorry ass anymore – let me just say that I didn’t try this alone, and I wasn’t the only one who reaped the benefits. Using this as round one made all my nerve-endings more sensitive. So everything my man did afterward received three times the accolades they normally would have received.
Any guy who doesn’t feel more of a stud by making his woman have a better time is a misogynist anyway, so go fwap yourself, I’m not writing to you in the first place.
Who I AM writing to, are all those out there who actually do believe that in the year 2011, women should have the right to seek their own pleasure – and that there’s nothing wrong with that.
And I’m writing to the networks to say, WTFWYT? I mean, really, Oprah? As a single woman, you honestly expect us to believe that this isn’t something you’d buy for yourself? Or do you just not want others to have it? Because honestly – I can’t figure out WTFYWT.
Maybe I’m missing something. You tell me.
But if you’ve watched the spot and don’t find anything wrong with it, you might want to write to the networks or stop watching them.
Or get one of these bad-boys for yourself for while you’re watching their network.
At least that way, you’ll know you’ll have a good time while you’re doing so.
I welcome your input below, as always.
UPDATE!
12/21/11
Intensity did get their spot on air. The only networks that would air it were WE (but only in the late night spots), LOGO (only after 10pm, which really seems ridiculous when you consider their primetime programming), and Discovery Fitness and Health (who was the ONLY network willing to run the ad at any time).
Additionally, Intensity read my post and wants to offer my readers a discount. If you go to intensitynow.com and buy one of their stimulators, you can get 10% off by using the code OMG10 (like “OMG – 10%” off) in the discount code box.
Have a happy holiday season, everyone!
Okay, I’m a little late on this one.
And I gotta admit, I’m of two minds. The proper business person side of me says, “OMG, you can’t do that! Disney will sue you into non-existence!”
But the part of me that revels in those taking a risk for breakthrough marketing says, “OMG! YOU ROCK!”
And while the image makes you gasp and giggle, the absolute brilliance is that they had placed it online. So people shared the image before Disney could do anything and then brought it down. Some may claim that the ad is a good PR stunt – but I say, “Who’s the target? Seems like it’s a good ad to me!”
Oh, Jamieson, you stole my heart. I may not know exactly what you were thinking at the time, but I’m glad you thought it.
Today, I opened my weekly Friday Gaming Update from MicroCenter.
Right smack in the middle of offers on games, consoles, and controllers, was this particular ad:
Do my eyes deceive me?
What is this bottle that looks just like the “health restoring” potion that heals your character in almost every single fantasy-based RPG game in existance? An energy drink?
I couldn’t help but click on the link to learn more – which took me to the MicroCenter site, where they’re advertising the drink.
Okay. Harcos, Inc. I have never heard of you before. What the heck.
So, a google search and I’m taken to http://www.manapotions.com
This… this… Could there be a more perfectly niche product? And marketed through MicroCenter? BRILLIANT.
The website, clearly designed for gamers, promoting a product clearly designed for gamers. OMG! I never see planning this well done.
The site’s frame is used for navigation – at the bottom, where a console gamer is used to seeing it, not at the top like for a typical website. No words for the navigation until you mouse over the icons – there’s a scroll for “about”, a bottle for “buy”, a spyglass for “locate, a… well, I don’t know what it is for “Fun”, and a sealed letter for “contact.”
According to the About page, the products are sugar free energy shots. For gamers. You can buy them from their site (or through the locate page) find retailers locally.
The biggest coup of the site, though, is the fact that the fun page is the most populated page of the site. Six big icons of fun:
Now, I’m not a HUGE gamer, although I do enjoy a nice bit of Baldur’s Gate every now and then. And I’ve never even tried an “energy shot.” Yet, somehow, after visiting this site, I kinda want to.
Hm… I may just need to make a pilgrimage to MicroCenter.
Yeah. That’s marketing that’s working!
My thanks to @kkreft for bringing this one to my attention.
Okay, first off, let’s talk about the language here. As @kkreft pointed out in her tweet, the last two sentences in this article are VASTLY inappropriate for a professional business publication:
Put the two trend stories together and here’s the logical takeaway: Being poor, wearing a giant muu-muu and not wiping your butt makes you super horny.
Who knew?
As is the title. We all know sex sells. And this article did make me laugh. But is that what you really want from a business publication? To get your readers to laugh? Or do you want them to trust you for advice? I’m not going to go to a comedian for business advice as a general rule.
Next, and this is what really sticks in my craw, who the hell gave them the right to use a Jiffy Lube(R) logo here? This offends my sense of brand.
Does Jiffy Lube really want to be associated with personal lubrication? I don’t think so. They’re a respected automotive service. If I were the Jiffy Lube brand manager, I would be SUING B-net right about now. That little circle-R means that logo is protected property. It shouldn’t be used this way.
Everyone likes a laugh. But there is a point when you have to protect your brand. I think this is one of those times.
B-net, where is your journalistic integrity, and WTFWYT?
Kentucky Fried Chicken. Oh, the greasy goodness. Remember the days of fighting your sibling(s) for the last drumstick in the bucket?
But we’re all pretending we want to eat healthier now. So, KFC – rather than sticking to what they do best – decided to throw their hat into the “no, it’s healthy. Really!” ring, by coming out with Kentucky Grilled Chicken.
What the heck, right? It’s only one letter off, and it’s even the next letter in the alphabet. KFC becomes KGC.
Except, could they have run the promotion more poorly?
This article from ad age says it all, although it says it much more nicely than I would. What dumbass decided to run downloadable coupons and didn’t figure that people would photocopy them? Seriously! Have you MET people? EVER?
What corporate genius agreed that it was okay to run a free food promotion without getting full cooperation from the franchisees first?
And I know Oprah is insanely popular, but didn’t anyone consider the ramifications of the product they were asking her to push and how it might be perceived as a WEE bit counterproductive?
Worse yet, what marketing maven decided that a good backup for the promotion – once they decided to yoink it due to too many people making off with free chicken – was to make people fill out a form for a coupon for a free pepsi? OOOOOH. Free pepsi. That equates to a free 2-piece meal. That will make everything all better!
You really have to love the marketing thinking that says it’s okay to piss off your regular customers because you’ve gotten some new ones.
Let me clarify something:
It’s never okay to piss off your regular customers folks. These are the ones that keep you in business.
All I have to say is, KFC WTFWYT?!
I have to agree with The Daily Dish.
This is the worst logo ever.
For the Catholic Church’s Archdiocesan Youth Commission.
OMG. WTFWYT.
No words.
SPAM.
Photo by Grumbler %-| courtesy of Flickr
It’s nutritious and delicious, my grandfather would say. Then again, he lived through the great depression.
For the rest of us, that word brings to mind the countless hours we spend sorting through junk mail in our email box.
But, come on. Be honest. Every now and then, you’ll see a piece and you just HAVE to read it. Or at least read the subject line out loud.
So, here at WTFWYT, we’re going to have the first annual WTF Spammy awards.
Prizes include:
a can of spam
a day of honor through tweets by WTFWYT
and possibly even a link to your blog from here. I haven’t decided yet.
How do you enter?
Just email me, omgwtfwyt at gmail dot com, forwarding your spam entry and why you think it should be honored here. (Yes, I know. I’m requesting spam to my email. Don’t make me regret this, people!)
Here’s the first candidate.
Subject: Literally become a monster snake in my pants
If you’re going to claim to be an expert on something, the end-all-know-all resource for a very specific tool, you probably shouldn’t flaunt the fact that said tool deleted your account.
Lewis Howes, self-proclaimed LinkedIn expert, just posted this video saying his LinkedIn profile had been SUSPENDED and urging his devoted fans to petition LinkedIn on his behalf.
Now, I have never met Lewis Howes, nor have I read his book, and I’m not personally a LinkedIn expert. But… I sure as hell would not call him or buy his book after seeing that his “best practices” got his account shut down.
Lewis, you should have privately resolved this matter rather than posting a video on YouTube and tweets on Twitter publicly declaring that you have, in fact, no idea WTF you’re talking about.
While many of his worshippers are in an upheaval over this:
@jdoughtry @LewisHowes LinkedIn’s Angel of Death Kills Its First-Born on Passover. Incredible!
@iannarino @LewisHowes What’s going on with LinkedIn, bro? You are their biggest promoter.
(and a few dozen retweets of “I need your help… @LinkedIn kicked me off without warning. Check out this 2 min video why: http://budurl.com/jhfj”)
Sane people everywhere are turning against the beloved leader:
@phil_franks Question of the day…What happens to social media experts when they get suspended from their social accounts? Life=Over?
@NickSeguin: Karma is a bitch #LinkedInJustice
@phil_franks RT @NickSeguin Karma is a bitch #LinkedInJustice, Terms of Service=WIN
@RexDixon @rabeidoh @LewisHowes needs to read the TOS – he clearly violated it, that’s why they yanked his account! 
@repmekevets hahahahaha RT @LewisHowes I need your help… @LinkedIn kicked me off without warning. Check out this 2 min video why:
@repmekevets sorry @lewishowes, looks like you didn’t read the terms of service.. at all.
Fail.
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